In the vast universe of pizza, where toppings twirl like planets and crusts rise like cosmic dough, Dave Portnoy’s reviews are the North Star for fans seeking the ultimate slice. His candid critiques transform each pie into a narrative, where every bite tells a story as complex as a well-pitched baseball game. Portnoy’s unique ability to score pizzas with a blend of humor and precision serves as a perfect compass for pizza aficionados. Below is a carefully curated list of Dave Portnoy’s top 10 pizza reviews, ranked not just by score but by the vivid imagery and distinctive appeal that make each one unforgettable.
1. Joe & Pat’s – Paterson, NJ
Dubbed the “holy grail” of slices, Joe & Pat’s is a universe unto itself—where the crust is a golden sun, crisp and chewy, orbiting rich tomato sauce galaxies. Portnoy’s praise highlights the perfect balance: a slice that bakes with the precision of a pitcher’s fastball, delivering a harmonious blend of tang and tenderness that leaves an indelible mark.
2. Prince Street Pizza – New York, NY
Prince Street’s Spicy Spring pie, with its square, Sicilian-style foundation, is a fireworks display of bold, concentrated flavors. Portnoy describes the pepperoni bubbling like molten lava, cascading in flavor eruptions across the thick, airy crust that’s reminiscent of a sluggers’ powerful, well-timed swing.
3. Lucali – Brooklyn, NY
Lucali’s understated, artisanal approach is like a pitcher’s finesse pitch—subtle yet devastatingly effective. According to Portnoy, the thin crust is a delicate canvas, maintaining a balance that feels like the perfect harmony between cheese stretch and crust crunch, evoking the rhythm of a classic baseball double play.
4. Best Pizza – Brooklyn, NY
With a name boldly staking its claim, Best Pizza delivers on the hype with dough that puffs up like a rising baseball crowd’s excitement in the stands. Portnoy’s review captures its essence as a no-frills, straightforward slide into home plate: warm, satisfying, and packed with authentic New York attitude.
5. Patsy’s Pizzeria – East Harlem, NY
Patsy’s is the vintage fastball of the pizza world—timeless and reliable. Portnoy highlights the thin crust’s slight char as a signature curveball, surprising and delightful, wrapping around the fresh tomato sauce that laces every slice like precision pitching.
6. Artichoke Basille’s – New York, NY
Known for its creamy, decadent slices, Artichoke Basille’s is compared to an unexpected power hitter in Portnoy’s review. The rich artichoke and spinach blend is an explosive homerun of flavor, thick and hearty enough to satisfy even the most voracious appetites.
7. Lombardi’s – Little Italy, NY
Lombardi’s, America’s first pizzeria, carries the historical weight of a seasoned player in the majors. Portnoy’s appreciation revolves around its smoky, coal-oven-charred crust—a flavor packed with nostalgia and grit, much like a veteran who has earned every at-bat through sheer resilience.
8. Di Fara Pizza – Brooklyn, NY
Di Fara is the artisan’s masterpiece, handcrafted like the perfect scouting report. Portnoy’s review admires the slow-cooked sauce and hand-cut toppings, equating each slice’s meticulous layers to a game plan executed with surgical precision and heart.
9. Grimaldi’s Pizzeria – Brooklyn, NY
Grimaldi’s coal-fired pies are likened to an ace pitcher’s signature fastball—classic, sharp, and unforgettable. Portnoy praises the charred exterior and rich cheese melt as an experience that’s both intense and comforting, grounding the palate like a steady infield glove.
10. John’s of Bleecker Street – New York, NY
John’s rounds out the list with its brick oven prowess, delivering a slice that feels like a crisp double: quick, efficient, and crowd-pleasing. Portnoy notes its perfectly blistered edges and balanced sauce as the textbook execution of quintessential New York pizza—a timeless classic that never strikes out.
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